Ok so today I cancelled the Picnic, why? because there is a slight chance it might Rain. Now before you start with the, you don’t melt in the rain and a little rain never hurt anyone, please be warned I am an expert in this field. I will walk miles in the rain, many of my mountain walks have been when it is absolutely chucking it down. The difference in these walks and going for a picnic even if there is a slight hint of a shower is…the second activity includes my family. Oh yes we have tried venturing out in the rain but after our picnic in Brecon last year, I gave up.
We had just bought a brand spanking new van, six seats and large enough to carry our bikes. All excited we loaded in our picnic table, camping chairs,bikes and enough food and drink to feed an army. The youngest loaded enough Nerf guns that we could have been an army and we set off. In my head I had all these images of us in a field, not a care in the world, all the food would be laid out spectacularly and we would all be sipping drinks, making small talk while the kids ran around in the grass shooting each other with the toy guns. Hubby and I would be relaxed and it would be quite a romantic afternoon. Yeah right. as soon as we jumped in the van the rain started, I wasn’t too bothered Brecon is a good couple of hours away and there was plenty of time for the weather to improve, except it didn’t in fact it just got bloody worse.
One thing that I did not know until this rainy day, in Brecon there is nowhere to stop and set up a picnic, sure there are pull ins, but then you would have to eat at the side of the road. Not really what I had in mind. We were led a merry dance by a couple of signs offering picnic areas, poppycock they don’t exist. Well actually they do, but only in your rear view mirror after you have passed them and then when you Turn the van around they disappear, I promise this is the truth!! We drove for about an hour after reaching Brecon, it is still piddling down, youngest is moaning because he is starving, thirsty, tired, been in van too long, his phone has died, it’s raining, the Tories are in government, well you get the gist. Then the eldest feels the need to join in, he had much better things to do than spend his Saturday with us, like sit in his room watching Netflix eating his weight in junk food.
Then as if by magic the complaining stopped, unfortunately it was only because hubby who was trying to navigate and find an eating area has taken a wrong turn. Slightly underestimating the size of the van he decides to turn around. Well attempts to turn around, because we got stuck. Sideways on to the traffic, the turn he was attempting to do was too sharp for the van and we couldn’t go anywhere. Cue our daily domestic, “you and your bloody picnic!” was all he could say, I did bite my tongue as I could see that we are all way past just being worried, no this is a state of panic. After what I would say was a 550 point turn, a lot of swearing and a lot of shouting, we did eventually get free, oh and did I mention it’s still pissing down. I just want to go home but no……hubby didn’t come all this way, in the rain, to get stuck and to go home without a bloody sandwich. I didn’t have the heart to tell him at this point, there were no sandwiches. Lots of food but no sandwiches.
He pulls over onto a lay by at the side of the road. We are stopping here no matter what, he has this steely look in his eyes. it is raining harder than ever but out we jump, it is lashing down. Then hubby has a bright idea. If anybody saw four loonies huddled in the back of a Renault van, sitting on camping chairs with the back doors open that was us. Our indoor, outdoor picnic. We were so cramped unless an item of food was at the top of the cool bag you couldn’t have it, we had no drinks as there was no room to pour them and we couldn’t speak or hear each other as the rain was hammering the roof of the van so hard. I had bruises all over my legs from the bike pedals digging in everytime you wiggled a toe. We had one pasty each, not a Nerf bullet was shot or a single memory of kids running free and wild was made, and it definitely was not romantic. So this is why I do not do family and rain……Love as always Helen xxxx