My house is infested, how could I not know, apparently I have little pocket monsters everywhere.
It all began yesterday lunch time, when I heard the familiar ping on my mobile and there was a text from my youngest. I was filled with dread, the only time he texts from School is when he has forgotten something and this usually results in me jumping in the car, doing a supermarket sweep to buy forgotten items and running up the school to apologise to his teachers. Anyway this text was different, “Can you ask dad what my apple I.D. is?” now why he can’t just text his dad himself is anybodys guess, but I do as I am told. Hubby gives me the code and I read it back to him incorrectly three times, well it was about as long as War and Peace. Bloody hell talk about shooting the messenger. Finally I.D. has been delivered and I need to know what was so urgent that it couldn’t wait until school had ended. “Pokemon GoUK is out” was my reply. How fab, all I had heard about it at this point was you can fall off boats and get stuck in graveyards while playing it. If you are still unfamiliar with the concept then you have either been hiding on another planet or like me, until now chosen to ignore it. I think this is the general game in a nugget. You follow a map on your phone app, finding Pokemon and throwing balls at them to catch them, then you can get more balls from Pokestations which also pop up on this map. There is some talk about coloured teams but by this point my brain had switched off and was contemplating what wine I should treat myself to on Saturday. I casually mention to hubby the news of its UK release. Good God how easily a grown man can get excited. So hubby downloads it too.
I forgot all about our texting come ranting session in the afternoon and spent a good hour talking to myself on this blog, (I know your out there really, but it does feel strange sometimes, talking into the wilderness), then I did a bit of washing and waited for youngest to arrive home. At exactly 3.14, (I know it was exactly this time as he is on the bike and I need to keep a log of when to start panicking) I get another text, “Is it ok if I take a Detour so I can catch a few Pokemon?” Whooo I don’t like the sound of that, my worry levels start to rise, detour, where? I eventually pull myself together, picturing him with all his mates saying he couldn’t detour because his over protective, slightly mad mother who treats him as if he is five needs him home. I reluctantly say “Yes”
His little face when he arrived home all triumphant and grown up, he had been on his first (and last…kidding!) outing with the boys and was very succesful in catching a few Monsters. But this is where things started to get a little surreal, while I was making his tea and waiting for eldest to arrive home from work, he kept telling me he had to pop out because there was a Squirtle or something lurking in my front garden, then later on while I was back in front of the computer sitting on my bed he came in and sat next to me. In a very serious manner he informed me that on my bed, my actual bed was a Pidgey, I thought he said it was a pigeon, so I was quite relieved when he explained that it was in fact a Pokémon. He sat there throwing some imaginary pokeballs at it until he had captured it. Phew thank Christ for that…….my hero. He then informed me we had monsters in two other rooms and a base at the local train station where he has to go and pick some ammo up or something. Of course!! Now forgive me for thinking this, but I am wondering if he is a little off his rocker. Can he distinguish between this game and reality, he does know that these creatures are not real right? Because he is doing a bloody good job of trying to convincing me otherwise.
Eldest has finally arrived home from work and bypassed the fridge which usually means there is something wrong, usually his girlfriend, college, work or his hair won’t sit right. I thought I had better give him a bit of space and leave him alone. I sat for at least ten minutes before I could take it no more, “What’s wrong?” I ask as I burst through the bedroom door. He is laying on the bed looking longingly at his phone. “Nothing wrong”, he says “just sent out some incense and am waiting for the Pokemon to smell it and come so I can catch them.” Oh yeah why didn’t I think of that, Jesus Christ the boy is twenty and he’s gone bonkers too. I give up, I have one son catching Pokemon that have already taken over my home and another opening the floodgates to invite more in. This place is a mad house.
I head downstairs to see what hubby wants for food this evening, I look all around for him, no sign. He then comes running in from the garden, I told him I had been looking for him, to which he replied, “Sorry there was a Rattata in our olive tree” Fuckin Hell there’s no hope!!!!!………….Love as always Helen xxxx