I have no cute way to start this off. I feel like there should be a nice little metaphor about what it’s like to live with Anxiety, but everything feels very overdone and nothing quite captures the essence of it. I have anxiety and it’s a thing that I have to deal with to differing degrees from day to day, something that will never leave me and something that I have to learn to live with and manage from day to day. I’m not as bad as I used to be and it is gradually getting easier, but I doubt it will ever be completely gone.
Anxiety comes in many flavours and I can only talk about mine. I’ve been diagnosed with generalized anxiety Disorder, getting that only after going in for insomnia. I used to get panic attacks, but those have since tapered off and are a lot more rare now.1 Mine is not as bad as other people have it and I’m not regularly medicated for the disorder itself, just the sleep disorder symptoms of it.
For me, things build up slowly over time. There’s no one thing that sets it off. I don’t actually know al of my triggers for it, so it’s a little difficult to pinpoint one thing to avoid. I know there’s certain sounds that will accelerate things, or being around people to too long, or even not being around people. Not eating is both a symptom of it and something that exacerbates it, as does not sleeping.2
But I’m learning to manage it. For me, a lot of things pile up and I get overwhelmed, so I’m starting to organize my life and make time for non-productive activities. I’m doing stuff for my health and finding a balance between the day job, the passion job, and having an actual life around it all.
So why talk about it? What I’ve found in my personal life is that talking about it is helpful for other people with similar problems. Now that we don’t have nearly as much stigma against these things, we don’t have to stay as quiet and more people can get help. So I’m going to talk a little about it, And, you know, maybe some of the strategies I am using here are helpful to other people.
- They’re also a lot worse when they do show up, but I’ll get into that later
- More on the insomnia later.