A friend of mine recently was in final talks to join a new retail brand and head to what they thought was a huge , yet small , step in their career. The month long process consisted of 4 interviews, some face to face and the ever so hard "phone" interview. The signs all pointed to "yes" as both location, money and all the other interview boxes had been checked off. The big call came, and it wasn't what they had expected. Different location, nothing near what they wanted salary wise and ultimately no where near the right fit they had predicted.
Life is everyone making plans and then realizing its pointless. There is a master blueprint somewhere that we cant predict or even attempt to misdirect. Each time we sit down to think about how we all have it figured out , a current pulls in another direction.
Lately, I have been in a similar fix as my friend. Thinking I had it all figured out, I too was hit with a 95 mile an hour curve ball. The chalkboard in our minds requires that old school dusty eraser too. Over and over I had gone back to this "drawing board" to reestablish my next phase and even went to far to starting a post about my plan and its 3 part hurtles.( a post you will now not see for sometime) .
The biggest disappointment in life is when you are totally caught off guard by what felt so right all along. From marriages to careers moves, we all sense the world is aligned and all the pegs fit with ease. When the pieces fall short, we are left thinking how could I have been so wrong. Truth is, we want it so badly that we make it seem right. We nearly force those pegs to fit and lie that they were easy. Nothing truly falls into place without some effort on our end.
The title of that said post was my " 3 Year Plan" . The goal at 40 was, and still is, to be in this different place ... mostly in the career bucket. My personal life is happy, and the partner I have chosen needs little to no improving( side note, one of the "buckets" in that 3 year plan was to build our relationship to new heights.... so NO.. its not perfect or without its needs. He also would agree he needs no improving. Ego, a sexy dangerous thing folks. ). The real work was in my career and I had foreseen this stepping stone to its climatic heights. Yes, I am rethinking and re-imaging how we will still get there, and this isn't a pity party. ( side note, Pity party is the latest and greatest retail phrasing we are using this month to describe anyone struggling to make their massive people problems better! Feel free to use it in your work place too! ) Truthfully, I am not discouraged but the awareness to the massive ground shaking change of course is top of mind.
Goals are meant to be achieved right? Some are small that as we plan them we know they will be easy to bare. Some... are huge and require work, movement, and pushing of ones self into that next life mark. Its the pushing that breaks a sweat as you really must come to grips with what you might lose in the interim... and what you might lose is the scariest of them all.
The march to 40 continues. I am 37 in a few months, and I want to enter that year clear minded, and ready to sweat. Whatever I thought I had figure out has changed. Like a GPS that is all turned round....we are. .....Recalculating. Recalculating . Recalculating .