What is Social Anxiety? “Social anxiety is the fear of social situations that involve interaction with other people.
I have been experiencing social anxiety all my life, without really knowing it. I always thought I was just socially awkward and shy.
Every single interaction with someone has been a struggle for me. I have always been afraid of being judged negatively. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve got plenty of reasons to worry about that.
My brother was never the compassionate or empathetic one. He was always the spiteful and hurtful one. If he knew your weakness, he would use it against you when he was mad. In the most vile ways. He has always insulted my appearance, my capabilities to hold down a job, my parenting ability. He’s also called me every name in the book, so my skin is pretty thick.
My dad, on the other hand was more of a joker. More surface than he was deep. He was certainly deep, I figured out a while ago, but he definitely wouldn’t outwardly express it. Everything was a joke to him. I guess that made it easier for him to deal with. So any reaction I got was either super critical or a joke.
I’ve also had to deal with a lot of bullying in my school years. So yeah, social interactions have always been a sore spot.
But surprisingly enough, I’m super outgoing and loud. Social anxiety has given me a lot of restrictions for a lot of years and I wasn’t even aware of it.