DAMNED IF YOU DO
Recently, a friend of mine was telling me about how they were 'outed' on Facebook by a close relative who posted information regarding a health condition this person has, but did not want to share that information with everyone on Facebook. Without my friend's permission. My friend seemed distraught so I tried to relate to the issue and proceeded to offer my opinion had I been in that same situation. Wrong.
As soon as I began to give my opinion on the subject as a way to support and relate to my friend, they jumped all over me to defend the person who outed them, saying their intentions were good and they didn't want to hear anyone say bad things about this person. (The relative was raising money for a good cause and was using my friend as a marketing tool to raise more cash. Hello?!)
First of all, I don't know this person AT ALL, and I was only trying to relate to my friend's plight, but I ended up being the bad guy. Second, I was just trying to be part of the conversation. What is wrong with people? This was clearly a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde situation that I was not expecting.
The moral of the story is never give advice to friends. Just listen and say, 'Uh-huh. Yeah. I'm sorry.' Don't get invested. Don't try and sympathize. Don't say anything but short, agreeable, supportive answers. Otherwise, you'll end up like me...the bad guy.
This is why I don't have many "friends." Eventually, they will do something that will put a question mark on your friendship and you won't even see it coming.
Recently, a friend of mine was telling me about how they were 'outed' on Facebook by a close relative who posted information regarding a health condition this person has, but did not want to share that information with everyone on Facebook. Without my friend's permission. My friend seemed distraught so I tried to relate to the issue and proceeded to offer my opinion had I been in that same situation. Wrong.
As soon as I began to give my opinion on the subject as a way to support and relate to my friend, they jumped all over me to defend the person who outed them, saying their intentions were good and they didn't want to hear anyone say bad things about this person. (The relative was raising money for a good cause and was using my friend as a marketing tool to raise more cash. Hello?!)
First of all, I don't know this person AT ALL, and I was only trying to relate to my friend's plight, but I ended up being the bad guy. Second, I was just trying to be part of the conversation. What is wrong with people? This was clearly a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde situation that I was not expecting.
The moral of the story is never give advice to friends. Just listen and say, 'Uh-huh. Yeah. I'm sorry.' Don't get invested. Don't try and sympathize. Don't say anything but short, agreeable, supportive answers. Otherwise, you'll end up like me...the bad guy.
This is why I don't have many "friends." Eventually, they will do something that will put a question mark on your friendship and you won't even see it coming.
