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I was giving it all to the blues!

I was unhappy with myself, blamed, cribbed, complained and fretted over almost everything.
I didn’t like to see the mirror because it made me look ugly.
I was seeing myself as perfect and detested reflections.
I swung abuses and hurtful words because I “thought” my silence isn’t working.
I was raged, held grudge, I judged and was tactlessly blunt.
I cried being short-tempered because I needed sympathy from people.
I went to the beach to see the dirt, neglecting the vastness of the gorgeous sea behind.
I was not letting go being insecure.
Nothing was enough.
I fought to get what I “thought” I deserved.
I was creating blues. (self-destruction)

I was rebounded, fell flat on my face, was kicked, was spitted upon and mocked upon ruthlessly.
I laughed, “Oh!!, this life does give birthday bumps on no birthdays at all.”
I was enjoying the mess. (acceptance)

I looked at the world around, had an insight, accepted the reality- I realized that I was wrong.
I saw myself as an individual, not as a self-obsessed philosopher running away from responsibilities and the reality.
I was experiencing the change. (enlightenment)

I fought back to win. I gave up to loose.
I was compassionate.
I was earning back my life. (actually living before I die)

(Not from the hands of bodhisattva)

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I was giving it all to the blues!


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