To pull off a successful Robbery, so I’m told, requires meticulous attention to detail. One little slip can lead to your undoing.

It is a pity that Matthew Bloomquist from Hawick in Minnesota didn’t follow this advice. He, and probably an accomplice, thought it would be a good idea to relieve a farm in Maine Prairie of its timber stock and other items. They loaded their pick-up truck with the loot but whilst trying to make their escape, drove into a big pile of farm manure.

They spent the rest of the night trying to get the vehicle free and whilst his accomplice ran off, Bloomquist was found by the Stearns County police standing by his vehicle, smoking a cigarette and covered from his waist down in manure. Not exactly caught red-handed but very much in the brown and nasty.

The (very) long arm of the law carted him away.

Still a vigorous shower would have put Bloomquist to rights. It will take a little longer for John Casford to recover from his theft that went wrong. His brain wave was to steal a squirrel monkey from New Zealand’s Wellington zoo.

To effect the robbery, he climbed into the enclosure. But the animals, who must be feisty creatures, were having none of it and in the ensuing melee Casford sustained a broken leg, a broken tooth and some bruising to his back.

He has two years in chokey to recover from his ordeal.