Sorry about the lack of commentary on yesterday's post but I think the word whippin' I received for leaving out the three toed sloth was worth the price of admission.
Let's look at todays match ups
Lions vs Polar Bears: I know what you're thinking. "He's going to vote for the lions." Quit acting like you know me. YOU DON'T KNOW ME!! I'm voting for Polar Bears. You ever seen a Mama Polar Bear with a cute little bear cub? It's sooooo cute! How can you vote against that? And not to lose all of my manhood on my blog, Polar bears are still big and strong and in the wrong situation will make you shit you pants upon sight.
Pandas vs Hippos: Pandas you sure are cute but Hippos sure do rock the spot! HIPPOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOS!!
Monkeys vs Seals: Come on let's face it Monkeys smell bad. I know I don't smell like a rose most days but I sure as hell don't smell like a monkey. Seals spend a lot of time in the water so they can't smell bad. Plus seals do stuff like this.
Zebras vs Koalas: Wow this is a tough one. Mitch Hedberg said all that needs to be said about Koalas. But zebras are making some important social commentary on the way we need to live in America. Those zebras know what's up. I'm voting Zebra.
Penguins vs Gorillas: A gorilla will fuck you up and then sit down scratch itself and chew on a stick like nothing happened. The look on its face is like it didn't even remember something happened. "OH MY GOD!! WHAT DID YOU DO TO ROGER?!" ... "Who?" Yeah fuck that. I'm voting for Penguins.
Tigers vs Llamas: Llamas do something that I find really endearing. If you shave the hair off a llama's chest they become embarrassed and will go hide until they feel comfortable with being seen again. That makes me go awwww. I want to vote for the llamas but the guy in me is warning me that I've already voted against the lions so I better vote for the big cat. Tigers get the vote.
Giraffes vs Kangaroos: Giraffes are tall. I'm tall. I'm voting Giraffes. One thing I don't get about nature. Why would nature make it so hard for the giraffe to drink water. That's mean of you nature.
Elephants vs Otters: Elephants. I love them. They are nature's tanks. And if you ever watch a documentary on elephants you will see that they are very caring animals. I love that. They have trunks that can be used as a trumpet. Elephants are great but otters are so much fun to watch swim around!. Elephants you have to watch for months on end and then all of a sudden you have a eureka moment. That's not quite feasible for zoo watching. Otters are instant gratification. My vote goes to the otters.
See you tomorrow!
Rogie Dodgie
Let's look at todays match ups
Lions vs Polar Bears: I know what you're thinking. "He's going to vote for the lions." Quit acting like you know me. YOU DON'T KNOW ME!! I'm voting for Polar Bears. You ever seen a Mama Polar Bear with a cute little bear cub? It's sooooo cute! How can you vote against that? And not to lose all of my manhood on my blog, Polar bears are still big and strong and in the wrong situation will make you shit you pants upon sight.
Pandas vs Hippos: Pandas you sure are cute but Hippos sure do rock the spot! HIPPOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOS!!
Monkeys vs Seals: Come on let's face it Monkeys smell bad. I know I don't smell like a rose most days but I sure as hell don't smell like a monkey. Seals spend a lot of time in the water so they can't smell bad. Plus seals do stuff like this.
Zebras vs Koalas: Wow this is a tough one. Mitch Hedberg said all that needs to be said about Koalas. But zebras are making some important social commentary on the way we need to live in America. Those zebras know what's up. I'm voting Zebra.
Penguins vs Gorillas: A gorilla will fuck you up and then sit down scratch itself and chew on a stick like nothing happened. The look on its face is like it didn't even remember something happened. "OH MY GOD!! WHAT DID YOU DO TO ROGER?!" ... "Who?" Yeah fuck that. I'm voting for Penguins.
Tigers vs Llamas: Llamas do something that I find really endearing. If you shave the hair off a llama's chest they become embarrassed and will go hide until they feel comfortable with being seen again. That makes me go awwww. I want to vote for the llamas but the guy in me is warning me that I've already voted against the lions so I better vote for the big cat. Tigers get the vote.
Giraffes vs Kangaroos: Giraffes are tall. I'm tall. I'm voting Giraffes. One thing I don't get about nature. Why would nature make it so hard for the giraffe to drink water. That's mean of you nature.
Elephants vs Otters: Elephants. I love them. They are nature's tanks. And if you ever watch a documentary on elephants you will see that they are very caring animals. I love that. They have trunks that can be used as a trumpet. Elephants are great but otters are so much fun to watch swim around!. Elephants you have to watch for months on end and then all of a sudden you have a eureka moment. That's not quite feasible for zoo watching. Otters are instant gratification. My vote goes to the otters.
See you tomorrow!
Rogie Dodgie
