LET’S DISCUSS THIS SPECIAL CHARITY ANNOUNCEMENT INSTEAD

Hey look a new episode cool neat great I’m sure it’s very witty and full of insightful observ-ONE THOUSAND GIANT CHURCH BELLS SOUND AT ONCE

The Shutdown Fullcast only really exists to cause misery and pain, either to you, the audience, or to me, the one trying to edit the thing into listenability and failing miserably. But we’re going to try to change that this year with the SPECIAL FULLCAST FUCK YOU HURRICANES charity drive. (That name is still being workshopped.)

Here’s how it works.

STEP ONE: You donate to one of these fine organizations working on Harvey/Irma relief.

The Houston Food Bank

The Miami Diaper Bank

The Harry Chapin Food Bank of Southwest Florida

Oxfam efforts in the Caribbean

STEP TWO: You email your donation receipt to Ryan ([email protected]).

STEP THREE: You listen to the Shutdown Fullcast religiously and wait to hear us botch this, somehow.

For a donation of at least $50, we’ll thank you by name at the end of an episode. Bump that to $100 and we’ll throw in a short read out of your choosing. (Example: “Thank you to Spencer Hall, who reminds you that the touchdown cake is a lie.”) $200 and up and we’ll give you your own ad read, much the same way we do for valued corporate sponsors. We’re really hoping they don’t listen to those, by the way.

Your deadline: the end of September. That’s a lot of time, but don’t waste it! Go donate now and then we’re legally obligated to say nice things about your team!*

*this may not be true, I am and was a terrible attorney