I took on all your judgemental stares, I looked at the information regarding children having dummies, I heard you when you said “jeez, he still has a dummy!?!?”. 

Yesterday was operation ditch the Dumdums in the day, it went well. Today, not so much. He had got himself so worked up, I lost my shit and he cried even more. He started opening the front door, because he knew by doing it he would get my attention as I ironed their clothes, he didn’t care it was negative attention. He was screaming and I was ignoring him. 

I then stopped, I left the ironing and realised in his tiny mind he couldn’t understand what had gone wrong. Why Mummy?? Why not dumdums? Please Mummy, listen to me!

It was actually heartbreaking because I had inflicted that on him. I am completely to blame for his outburst this Morning and I upset him SO much that as soon as I picked him up he nuzzled into my neck and let out the occasion sob as I soothed him. 

I understand the debate on dummies and thumb suckers can be as strongly argued as bottle vs breast. I truly do believe it really is none of anyone’s business how you choose to soothe your child or even feed your baby. If they have a comfort blanket, a thumb or a dummy, it really has nothing to do with anyone else.

I know health visitors will tell me he shouldn’t have had one beyond 6 months. I know he will no doubt need a brace when he’s older, he may hate me for it. No, it’s not in his mouth morning, noon and night, but even if it was and it offends you, look the other way. I’ve made a decision this morning, and that is Toby and I will work together in the future to get rid of it. I don’t particularly care about the kid that dropped it at 4 months and that I should try harder. I’m not all that interested in statistics either, because Toby is unique and he isn’t a statistic. He is my son, and he doesn’t need too much in life, but this little piece of plastic, right now is important to him. 

I’m not perfect, I’ll hold my hands up and say – today I got parenting wrong and the world will Continue spin, life will continue as normal. Why is their such a need to act like we never get things catastrophically wrong? Why do we pretend our kids don’t cry because of the mistakes we’ve made? Why do we pretend we’ve not then cried for the fuck ups that have led to their tears? I don’t need to be perfect, I don’t need to get it right all the time. I just need my kids to know that for all the times I have made the wrong call, I am truly sorry and I will continue to work hard to get it right because I love them with every inch of my body.

Go ahead and judge, I’ll be that Mum giving zero fucks about your looks and whispers. 

Peace out ❤