It’s these little moments as a School Mum that I truly love. I always make sure I bake a Cake, decorate it nicely and try to support the school the best way I can. I lovingly prepare them but because I’m so exceptional, I put hidden vegetables in the cakes so the kids are not only getting a little treat but they’re also totally unaware they’re getting one of their 6 trillion a day that they’re not supposed to have.
The teachers always commend me for my dedication and how well presented not only the cakes but also my children are.
Okay let me give it to you for real!
I’m hula hooping in the living room with my hoop of doom (its fecking evil) and Steve walks in with this piece of paper. I looked at it, prayed magically the numbers would change to say cake sale is next Wednesday … that didn’t happen so I rung off a long list of expletives (fuck, shit, the usual) and then realised what a pain in the arse being a shool Mum is. I love to support a good cause, I love to bake, but tonight those two things can wait because I’m in my slouchers and these bad boys aren’t coming off for no one (you heard right Steve).
My cakes, although I try so hard tend to look like they’ve been dropped twice on the floor and dusted off and Toby usually has snot smeared across his face, I’m yet to be commended for either of those things.
Tomorrow I will do a exceptional job of taking Elliott to school, running to asda and buying whatever is on offer (payday next week, hard times), running back to school and handing it in.
That my friends, that is how you do the school cake sale.