Getting onto certain talk shows puts a star in the artist caste. One of these shows is Charlie Rose. I love Charlie, I really do. My first boss in New York was friendly with the producers of Charlie Rose and used to send them faxes all the time with publicist speak and salutations like "lovey". That's when I first became aware that there was a person named Charlie Rose who had a floating table in blackest space where alien life forms from various media would land.

I think some of the interviews are pretty insightful and/or incisive, some are the usual worshipper fare and some of them surprise the hell out of me. Like last night's interview with The White Stripes. The White Stripes? What in God's name were they doing on Charlie Rose? I mean I know they get tons of buzz and rave critical reviews, but aren't they a bit, I don't know, gothic or something for Charlie Rose? Just seeing them sitting there like this was going to be an intellectual discourse about their innovative technique made me blink a few times. (Side note, why does Jack White want to look like the spawn of Satan and the Pillsbury Dough Boy?)


What scared me even more is that Charlie Rose was practically genuflecting in worship of them. Isn't Charlie Rose a little mature for their sort of thing? I would think somebody kind of brought him up to speed on who they are (hell, I'm not even cool enough to know more than a couple of their tunes), but he was seriously smitten. And what's up with the two White Stripes, anyway? What a weird kind of relationship they must have.

Meg White seemed shallower than my daughter's bath water and Charlie didn't even try to draw her out much. I'm still giving her the benefit of the doubt, but her portion of the interview was kind of like, "I just want to reach people and feel their energy. I do whatever Jack wants me to do."

So, Mr. Rose spent most of the time wanting to know how it was for a God like Jack to dwell on this earth with mere mortals. I have to admit that Jack did seem pretty smart. Weird in kind of a scary way, but smart. Did you know that he produced Loretta Lynn's recent album? Yeah, it was one of those shows.