wis·dom (ˈwizdəm/)

noun

the quality of having experience, knowledge, and good judgment; the quality of being wise.

Matt bought me this Bracelet as a sort of a “surgery gift.” There’s a store at the Pittsburgh airport called ZoZo that I love. I always want to buy everything in there. Luckily we had to walk right past it going from our gate to baggage claim. I decided to stop in and finally buy something from there. I just had neurosurgery, so I deserved it, right? There were so many things that I wanted in the store, but in the end I settled on three beaded bracelets.  They all had translucent, irregular glass beads and a word hand stamped on a piece of metal. Matt insisted on buying me one as a gift.

The bracelet that said “HOPE” had my favorite color beads, as they were a beautiful aqua color that I always gravitate to. I also always gravitate to the word “hope.” I love anything with cheesy inspirational words and phrases. The bracelet did not fit, which was probably for the best, seeing that I already so may things that say “hope” on them, including bracelets.

The second bracelet was a light blue on that said “JOY.” Joy just didn’t seem to fit the last eight days. I was happy that I was finally back in my home state and that the surgery was finally a thing of a past, but joy was not the way I’d remember this surgery and recovery.

The final bracelet said “WISDOM” with green beads. I love this shade of green.

At first didn’t think that the word “wisdom” could describe my experience since my surgery. But the more I thought about it, it was the perfect word. I gained a lot of wisdom from this experience.

The night after the surgery I was in the most pain I’d ever experienced. I expected the surgery and recovery to be painful but nothing like it actually was. Excruciating. In 2014 I had a similar surgery on a much smaller scale. I was naive and though it would be similar.

I just wanted to lie down and quit. I’ve never been that close to throwing in the towel. The pain was unbearable. I can’t even describe it.

It was 1 am, but my nurse still wanted me to get out of bed. She wanted me to walk the halls. She wanted me to sit in the chair instead of the bed. She wanted to change my dressing and wipe me down.

I didn’t want to stand, but I did. And I walked in the hall some, had my dressing changed, was cleaned a bit, and was put in the chair, where I promptly fell asleep.

This felt like the most difficult endeavor I’d ever undertaken. It felt like an eternity. Hours. I’m sure it was just minutes. But, I did it. I somehow did it.

So what does that have to do with a bracelet that says “wisdom?” I learned a lot about myself that night. I Gained Wisdom because of that experience.

I gained wisdom from pain. I hope this bracelet will remind me to continue to do so.