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Welcome to the Hotel California

It's a cafe on the beach in Khorfakkan. No signboard. Just the weird and wonderful scarlet and black Decor, beckoning through the plate glass windows.
Once inside, resist that first impulse to roll up your trousers and step gingerly. The floor isn't wet, just lacquered to look like it is.
But keep minding your step -- those are real water channels cut into the ground, and the split levels necessitate a series of Jackie Chan style-jumps to reach your table.
The decor is pure Sottsass on steroids. There are red leather banquettes, sofas shaped like lips where you settle your butt into the pout (try remaining unselfconscious as you do so), zebra printed throw cushions, egg-shaped moulded plastic chairs, giant balls with seats hollowed out, and every other kind of homage that can be paid to Seventies decor.
The service is as hopped-up as a hippie at Anjuna. Ask them what the place is called, and you'll get nods, smiles and unintelligible gibberish. The waitress offers to get baby "a banana juice with milk" -- the first time I heard a milkshake decribed in that stomach-churning fashion. Our latte arrives loaded with a mini mountain of Nescafe granules, inspired no doubt by the breathtaking Hajars of the neighbourhood.
Wisely enough, the shawarmas appear half-an-hour later... after the brood has been pulled off the walls and strapped back into their seats.
Looking around we realise the regulars are used to their orders being missed or screwed up, but don't mind it much. Or maybe its just that balmy East Coast air which melts all angst.
I could get used to it too...
Like the beauty of the UAE's East Coast, Khorfakkan's very own Hotel California has a way of getting under your skin, tempting you to visit again.
Sometime soon, is my only New Year's resolution for 2006.



This post first appeared on Dubai Dates, please read the originial post: here

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Welcome to the Hotel California

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