It's not the fact that you threw the Spaghetti, 

but the fact you threw it at me!

Note: The people portrayed in this blog are just not real. I mean seriously! Who would put up with such nonsense!

This is the third part of the "Family Dinner Night" story:

• Part 1: https://nickstockton.blogspot.com/2018/11/its-all-about-family-dinner-night.html
• Part 2: https://nickstockton.blogspot.com/2018/11/putting-family-back-together-for-dinner.html

Tonight was the night of the first Family Dinner Night. My wife and I have been calling people all week trying to make this happen. Most of the relatives were already had plans or used that excuse to not go to dinner. In the end, we had the four of us, my parents, my wife's parents, and a set of Grandparents from my wife's side.

I drove the car in front of the restaurant and parked in the first available space. Myself, my wife, and the kids rolled out of the car and slammed the doors.

I yell out, "Be careful with the car!"

My son replies, "That's not the only slamming that going on in that restaurant Dad!"

My daughter interjects, "Seriously! I wonder if they can keep their hands off of each other!"

I stop all of us from walking into the restaurant and say, "Now that's enough. This is supposed to be family dinner night not whose making out in the restroom. I want all of you on your best behavior!"

The kids shook their heads up and down.

With that covered, all four of us walked into the restaurant. My Dad is sitting in the lobby. My Mom is sitting on the other part of the hall.

My Dad sees me first, gets up, and walks towards me, "Hey there! How are you doing?"
He gives hugs to the wife and kids, then points his thumb towards my Mom, "You see here there? She didn't even say hello to me."

Dad, that's OK. Maybe she doesn't know you're here.

My wife walks over to my Mom, "Hello, How are you?"

My Mom stood up, saw my Dad, and continued talking to my wife.

My Mom said, "When did he get here?"

My wife replies, "I don't know. He was here before I got here.

My Mom replies, "Maybe he saw me, but sat elsewhere because he didn't --"

The host interjected, "Family of Eight. Follow me."

All of us did exactly what he said. We followed him.

He placed us at an eight-person table with one of those lazy susan devices in front. It is so everyone can get to the food without waiting for people to pass it around.

I ask my wife, "Have you seen your grandparents yet?

She looks around, "No. I thought they would be here by now. Oh well. They'll be here. All of us had a chance to sit down, and the waiter arrived carrying several menus. As we were sitting there, menus in hand, trying to decide our dinner order, it was like one of those montages from a TV show. We were talking, laughing, having a good time. Even the kids (who were usually staring at their mobile screens) were engaged in conversation. I looked around the table and thought to myself that family dinner night was a really a good idea.

This is what happened instead ...

I look at my kids and say, "Give me your cell phones!"

They reply, "What?"

I state, "Give me your cell phones. I actually want you to talk to your relatives!"

My son asks, "Can't we just text?"

"No!", I reach out my hand and collect the cell phones, "You actually have to use the words which come from your mouths. Talk to your Grandparents!"

My wife's phone goes off, and she says, "I need to take this!" and leaves the table. But there is something strange about the call. I get up from the table and follow my wife around the corner where ... she is watching a YouTube video!

"Ah!", I yell, "I caught you!"

She puts the video on pause and says, "Damn it! How did you get me?"

I reply, "That's not your usual ring tone. That's the sound which plays if you get an email."

She says, "I'll have to change it later."

I ask the obvious question, "Why are you here?"

My wife replies, "I don't know what to talk to them about. I haven't seen them in a year."

I say, "Try."

My wife agrees, "Ok. I'll try. But since I'm up, I have to take care of something."

I knew what she meant, and walked back to the table. Remarkably, the social skills in the children kicked in and they were actually talking to my parents.

It was then that my wife ran to the table. She saw the glass of wine on the table and drank it down like she's been walking through the desert. She pointed to the waiter, then to her glass, which is the international sign language for: "Get me a refill on the wine ... STAT!"

I turn to my wife and ask the obvious question, "Honey why ..."

Then, I looked up and knew why.

My wife's Mom approaches the table first, "I hope you haven't been waiting too long!"

Then her Dad appears, a little sweaty, but in an excellent mood, "Sorry for the delay."

The waiter came back with another glass of wine ... she makes the international sign of: "Give me the bottle!"

That's when everything clicked. But, I couldn't say a thing, in front of the kids. I just smiled, nodded, and pressed on with Family Dinner Night.

By the end of the evening, everybody was getting along, or at least that's what I thought. I wanted to propose a toast, used my fork to gentle hit it against the glass, then started t say a few words, "I wanted to thank everyone for coming tonight., I know --"

The waiter stops by and drops off the check. I picked it up and held it in my hand.

Just then, a few pieces of spaghetti whizzed past my head and hit me in the face.

I asked, "Who did that!"

As I was saying that exact line, another few strands of spaghetti whiz past my head.

Then the entire table erupted in a food fight. Each person throwing some sort of food item at someone else.

The manager of the restaurant came over to the table, "What are you doing?"

I replied, "Leaving!"

The family ran toward the door. Even the grandparents seem to have an extra zest in their steps as they ran out the door first before the rest of the family could get there. Fortunately, I had enough cash on me to cover the food and tip. I put it on the table and high-tailed it out of there.

Everyone ran to their cars and drove away. I decided to do the same. I hit the key FOB, the doors opened, the family piled in, and I burned some rubber in an old minivan heading out onto the highway.

After we cleared the scene, I said, "Well, I don't know about you, but I'm not going back there again!"

Everyone in the back of the car started laughing.

My wife asks, "How did this happen anyway?"

My daughter answers, "I don't really know. But, I think your Dad didn't like something that Dad's Dad said, and that's when the spaghetti started flying."

I reply, "So why did you throw spaghetti?"

My daughter replies, "It just seemed like the right thing to do at the time."

As the van continued down the highway, my wife going through her cell phone messages as the kids talked in the back of the van, I thought that this was a good family dinner night as ..., but I'll never plan an event like this again!

Thanks for reading the blog! If you have any questions, please let me know. Thanks!