A friend of mine told me that he's slept with about half of his friends. He puts people in buckets: Platonic, potential and can we Please fuck? I told him that I see all of my friends as platonic and he responded that I might be repressing something and not knowing it. I know many wonderful attractive guys but only think of them as someone to stir the pot for my single friends where I can watch from afar and giggle. He pointed to the cute guy in the mailroom. "You wouldn't mess around with him?" I responded, "I guess I would, but never really thought about it other than 'hey, he's cute' the end.
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It made me wonder, am I repressing something? I think about being affectionate with friends. A kiss on the cheek, a head in the lap, a long embrace, a short massage. Platonic, but still showing that you care for each other.
I thought about the power of cuddling. The intimacy, the smell, the touch, the warmth and the time. Can friends cuddle overnight and still sit in the platonic bucket? Or does it quickly move to potential? I recall "hook up" rules in which people declare that they would NEVER sleep over if their intention is nothing more than just loveless sex. Sex with strangers, separate from the friend group. Strangers that you would never incorporate into your actual life. Is it because embracing for a long period of time does something to the chemistry of the body? Feelings someone's breath and heartbeat. It feels like emotionally cheating which is worse than physically cheating because they've made it into your heart and not just your body. And maybe that's why I subconsciously try to keep my friends into one bucket to protect my relationship with the only guy I can imagine my life with.
