Tales from the 5th Grade — The Peer Pressure Deflector Shield

The origin stories of ordinary, everyday super powers — Chapter 3. The development of character, strength and independence.

The 1974–75 school year was when I accidentally learned a lot about myself. I was in the 5th grade. Personality, ideals and thoughts were forming a foundation for building who we would become.

It wasn’t until I was in my forties that I realized how much of my underlying character came out of the shadows that year.

If only youthful ignorance wasn’t so … well … ignorant.

My first recollection of attempted bullying was during the 5th grade. We had reached the stage of development when peer pressure began to intensify.

We were all coming into our identities, gravitating to like minded personalities and forming groups of various genres. The prettiest girls, the boys with physical prowess, the academically inclined kids, the budding comedians and, of course, the bullies.

There were some who overlapped into multiple groups, trying to figure out which was the best fit. The bully group in my class was like that. Sometimes it was tough to tell which person they were going to be that day. Maybe bullies, maybe comedians or they might walk on by without interaction.

My average appearance, diminutive size and quiet demeanor often led to an impression of wholesomeness and naivety. Toss in some wire frame glasses perched on my nose and you can add fragile and nerdy to the description.

Ah, yes! The perfect victim for a bully.

Or so it would appear.

Appearances can be deceiving. My mental fortitude was much stronger than my outer shell would suggest.

One day a group sauntered up to me and started a strange conversation about hair. Not knowing if they were trying out for the bully group or the comedian group, I was suspicious of the motivation for this sudden attention.

After a moment of contemplation as to whether or not I wanted to bite on the bait, curiosity got the best of me. I had to see where this was going even if it ended badly for me.

My suspicions were justified. It was the bullying group that day attempting to belittle me with an off-color joke involving hair color.

The bullies were sadly disappointed in my reaction. Their target selection skills clearly needed some work.

I wasn’t devastated or angry or amused. The words fired at me bounced right off my invisible Peer Pressure Deflector Shield.

If I knew how I got this shield, I’d be writing about that and making millions of dollars. But alas, I can only speculate as to the origins of my Peer Pressure defenses.

Maybe it comes from having a good sense of humor or the fact that I don’t embarrass easily. Maybe it’s that analytical mind of mine that in mere seconds can process the information and understand the realistic impact on life as I know it.

The origins of the shield are unclear. The power of the shield is undeniable, but not absolute.

Not all harsh words are deflected by the shields protective force. Sometimes weapons are fired before countermeasures can be deployed and a few stray bullets hit the outer ring of the target.

I did feel a pang of gullibility that day as the bullies’ laughter covered me like a dark, ugly cloud. For only an instant I allowed myself to fall victim to their insults. A tiny little nick torn from my confidence.

A moment later my shield was raised, and the taunts were cast aside. The emerging realist in me quickly deduced that the bullies’ words were pointless and a complete waste of my time.

So, I moved on.

The only real impact they had on my life that day was that I did not end up with a good joke to use later. I didn’t know at the time that my lack of reaction would be so deflating to the bullies.

The point to remember is that if the impact of a bully’s actions will only breathe life in your mind, then the best reaction is no reaction. It’s more about their insecurities than it is about you. Block their insecurities, step around their small mindedness and move on.

If anyone launches arrows of ridicule and hatefulness in my direction, I can raise my battered Peer Pressure Deflector Shield. I can deflect the pointlessness and protect that which is truly important to me, the characteristics that make me uniquely me.

What I’ve learned over the years is that your uniqueness can be your strength. Playing to your strengths is your advantage in the world.

Too bad I didn’t realize I had such mad skills in the 5th grade. That could have been a game changer.

Probably just as well. I’m not sure an 11-year-old is mature enough to responsibly wield such a formidable ordinary, everyday super power.

Your Thoughts:

What ordinary, everyday superpowers did you learn when you were growing up?

You Might Also Enjoy:

• Tales from the 5th Grade — The Pop Quiz Incident
• Tales from the 5th Grade — The Problem Solver’s Spectacles
• The Importance of a Kickstand

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Tales from the 5th Grade — The Peer Pressure Deflector Shield was originally published in The Ascent on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.