Jason arrives home with Missy.

Francis, the cat is in his bed, sleeping.

Jason goes to him and awakes him, or tries to.

Jason: Francis?
Cat (slurring): what…?
Jason: wake up Francis.

Cat: no… let me sleep…
Jason: come on you crazy cat, I need to talk to you.
Cat: whatever it was, it wasn´t me…

Jason: Francis!
Cat (annoyed): fine! Yes, it was me! Happy? Now let me sleep!

Jason picks Francis up and puts him on the kitchen counter facing both him and Missy.

Francis can barely stand straight. He´s severely hangover and tired from the night before which he spent doing God knows what. He´s too drunk to remember.

Francis is about doze off when Jason smacks him lightly in the head.

Cat: Hey!
Jason: Pay attention!
Cat: stupid human!

Missy: Francis, we need to talk to you.
Cat: Huh! Fine. I´m listening, for now anyways. Make it fast. You have about 30 seconds before I black out again. That or I´ll fart, maybe both.

Francis stops taking when he realizes the stupid smiles plastered on both Jason and Missy´s faces.

Cat: Oh God! What did you do?
Jason: Francis?
Cat: what?

Jason: Francis you´re going to become a big brother.
Cat: Dude, seriously? I am a big brother. I have like 30 siblings. Don´t ask me which are older or younger ´cause I don´t have a clue.

Jason and Missy keep smiling without saying a word.

Cat: Oh god! You´re thinking about getting another cat, aren´t you?
Missy: Francis… (stops and looks at Jason) I feel stupid doing this.
Jason: Just tell him, trust me, he understands.
Cat: I do.

Missy: Okay… Francis, I´m pregnant.
Cat: Gesundheit!

Missy: You´re going to become a big brother.
Cat: wow, what?
Jason: we´re having a son Francis. Now, don´t be jealous.
Cat: why would I be jealous?

Jason: now, I promise I´ll still pay attention to you, okay? You´ll always be my cat, but I am going to be a dad.
Cat: good for you.

Francis burps, loudly.

Jason starts laughing like crazy.

Missy: Pig!
Cat: I´m a cat.
Jason: I think he approves.
Missy: He burped.

Jason: that´s his way of saying Mazel tov!
Missy: you´re both crazy! I don´t know who´s going to be a worst influence on this kid, you or your cat.

Jason: Francis!
Cat: Jason!

Jason starts laughing and high fives Francis who responds accordingly.

Missy: Great! You´re both crazy!
Cat: I’ll take that as a compliment!

Suddenly…

Jason: Oh God! Francis!!!
Cat: what? I gave you fair warning. It´s not my fault you don´t listen…
Missy: did he just fart?

Francis looks at the both of them with a proud smile on his face while they run off due to the awful smell.

Cat: congratulations! Ha! Ha! Ha!

The end!

2017_Joana Teixeira