Cultural difference is a wonderful things and the FB is not averse to celebrating it. In the spirit of adventure, exploration and because I wasn’t paying for the ticket I decided to culturally explore Egypt. Yes, culturally explore, nothing else I’ll have you know my erstwhile (and no doubt imaginary) audience.

Learnt many a wonderful things in Egypt, not only did the Pharaohs built magnificent pyramids, constructed huge monuments and generally left a stone relief of their greatness in every nook but they did a lovely line in Scarab chocolates and natty Tut Aknh Amun headdresses. This was backed up by superb customer service and special prices – just for me. Its one small step for a similie but a giant leap for clichés everywhere.

I also discovered the universal phrase of the ancients that would put all your cares to rest Get your incense out and say “Don’t worry. It will be OK”. Everyone from Taxi Driver to General Manager can relax in the knowledge of this phrase.

Torn Jacket. “Don’t worry. It will be OK. I fix”

Three days to leaving Cairo, where’s my jacket “Don’t worry. It will be Ok. Shop Open. I fix”.

Two days to leaving Cairo, where’s my jacket. “Don’t worry. It will be Ok. In shop, shop open. Open. I fix”.

Night before leaving Cairo, where’s my jacket, “Don’t worry. It will be Ok. Shop Open. I fix. I get”.

Seven hours before flight, report to police, police say, “Don’t worry. It will be Ok.We bring jacket or we bring him and jacket”.

Four hours before flight police ring back, “Don’t worry. It will be Ok. Pick it up at hotel”.

See. One ancient phrase. Problem solved. Of course my other cultural learning I wil share with you next time.