I was planning a bigger post for today, but I spent most of the weekend eating charred meat and trying to explain basic Computer functions over and over and over again. That probably sounds like some kind of bizarre torture ritual, but actually, that's just another Father's Day with my dear old dad, who likes his coffee and his steak the same way - black. It was fun, and I learned that my dad is sort of a superhero, in a way.
So in honor of Father's Day, I wanted to share 5 fun superhero facts about my dad.
1. I've never seen him without a mustache. Ever. I always wondered what was beneath it, and it turns out that underneath his mustache, there is only a bigger, stronger mustache... waiting to strike.
2. When he was young, he would wrestle and kill wild wolves for sport, with his bare hands. He would then siphon their souls into his t-shirt. This is why he owns so many of those cheesy wolf t-shirts.
Each of them is a wolf he has bested in combat.
3. He believes that grilled meat needs to be properly charred because the crispiness on the outside traps the flavor on the inside, like a kind of cruel flavor prison.
4. He can break any computer just by touching it. Sometimes even by looking in its general direction. He can also install 8,000 toolbars on a web browser with but a single click.
5. Like the Greek warrior Achilles, his heel is his only weak spot. This is why he wears socks and sandals together, to act as double protection for his only single vulnerability.
As long as he wears this velcro padded armor, he is expected to live forever, continuing to terrorize wolves and computers with reckless abandon.
Oh, and he's also a pretty great guy. He's the kindest, most patient person I know, and I wouldn't be who I am without him. Take that as a good thing or a bad thing, I guess.
Any fun facts about your own father?
Cheers and stay fatherly, friends,
Bryan (and Brandon, who's about to be a father any time now)
Music: Toro y Moi
Beer: Not Your Father's Root Beer
| Notice how he's wearing the wolf t-shirt. Yeah, I didn't ask him to do that. He already was. Classic dad. |
Bonus: new (probably not to you) comic over on Tapas today. Check it out. Or don't.
https://tapas.io/episode/733362
