I went down to the bakery,
cause I was feeling hungry.
Bought myself a muffin,
that left my wallet with nothin,
and as I was heading back home,
to eat it and punch Styrofoam.
I turned left instead of right
and gave myself quite a fright.
A tall man approached me,
He had crumbs in his goatee.
"give me all your money" he said
As I wished Id never left my bed.
I looked up at him full of dread
"Sir I spent it on this piece of bread"
Suddenly he had a knife at my throat,
and I screamed like a YouTube goat.
"Then give me the muffin!" he shouted
"But I only have one" I pouted
"Sorry! but its the muffin or your life pal"
I begin to think of maths and pascal.
Then I kicked him in the balls
Oh! how the mighty fall.
but unfortunately he slit my throat
So I didn't have much time to gloat.

You may scoff at my actions,
and my expensive transactions.
But I assure you my story is true,
Why I did it? I have no clue.

All I know is that I would do anything for a muffin
Even if I end up in a cheap deadwood coffin.