Call me a liar,
call me a failure.
I can be whatever you want me to be,
except for a user.
I'd never be your abuser.
I loved you from the bottom of my heart,
but you never believed me,
I loved you even when you wanted me not to.
There's this thing I can never accomplish,
and that is to be with you.
I screwed up,
once or twice.
Maybe more than that...
A lot more...
But I always had respect for you,
and I always will.

I can't believe how someone like you,
someone so gorgeous and pretty,
someone so smart and funny,
would love a failure like me.
How can I believe the words you say,
when you don't even want to spend time with me.
How can I believe that you love me,
when I always got the same answer.

Time after time when I wanted to speak to you,
I got the same answer,
"not now, maybe later".
Well later may never come,
cause I might not be here for long.
I don't want to say this,
but you were a curse and a blessing.
You blessed me with something I thought was love,
you cursed me with emotions I cannot get out of my head.

I cannot love anyone else,
I cannot imagine myself with anyone else.
You are the one that I loved,
you are the one that I'll love.

It's not you,
it's you and your friends,
the stories you've shared.
I understood that I'd never be like them.

I'd waste my nights away just to talk to you,
but the moment when I wanted to hear your voice,
you'd always shut me out,
cut me off.

I might've been paranoid,
who am I kidding I most definitely was.
I still am.
But I know that you will never stay 20,
you're gonna grow older,
be bolder,
you're gonna be stronger,
why would you settle for a weakling like me.

The words you muttered,
with a dozen filters on,
you wanted me to believe them,
when you yourself told me it was for someone else.

I hope I never see you,
just because I know that you wouldn't want to,
I hope I'll never talk to you again,
just because I know that it would kill me.
I know that you wouldn't notice me,
when most of the time,
I recognize you in someone else.