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Fly as a lost boy

So life has been eventful to say the least. Not always what it’s cracked up to be. Had its many high highs and really low lows. A little bit of an extremist that way. Its been that way for me for a while and with so much happening it always seemed like time moved a lot faster.  I can barely remember things nowadays. Too much going on. It all becomes a bit of a blur. But I still cherish when it slows down. My quiet time, my alone time. The period when I can shut it all off and just be by myself.

I wonder what the normal people are doing. The people who have it all figured out. If we could all be so lucky. I’ve stumbled onto life so many times I forgot to count. I wish all my bottled up insecurities could be harnessed and used to fuel a trip to mars. NASA would never lack again. So its time. You’re a man now. You’re on your own now son. That’s the look my dad  gives me in the morning every time we cross paths. That’s not all he says. He says I’ve helped you out enough. It’s time now for you to take the reins.Time to take the training wheels off and do it yourself. I imagine the baby bird being dropped from the nest hurdling to his death. So that’s where I am right now. Suspended in mid air trying not to die.

I’ve experienced things people will never experience in their whole life and though it makes for great stories, I sometimes wonder whether it would make for a great life. Perhaps I need to buckle down, roll up my sleeves and just suck it up. To be honest my goals scare me. I keep thinking what if I don’t get there? Am I where I need to be? What’s next? Its the uncertainty that gets me. This thing they call life, am I really poet enough to call forth its riches. Maybe I am, maybe I’m not but all I can do is try.




This post first appeared on My Unspoken Word, please read the originial post: here

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Fly as a lost boy

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