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Why Should Men Always Propose?

A lot has changed since prehistoric and historic times. What hasn’t is the idea that men should get down on their knees. You see men seeking new and innovative ways to woo their beloved, but how many Women go to shops to purchase a ring? Even when you limit the entire proposal bandwagon, it speaks a lot about the gender structure and system of a particular culture or community. What exactly is the psyche behind such limitations? Why will people turn a suspicious eye towards a woman who proposes even today?

Women have been traditionally taught to be passive and submissive

Diya proposed marriage to Jai who wanted to be a Professor at Cambridge

Image Credit: Movie – Baar Baar Dekho

The roles assigned to men and women historically have been that of a breadwinner and a house maker respectively. You are taught into growing up in this “ideal” mold. Even today, as we are disrupting this status quo, women are expected to be passive, which means waiting for the guy to text you first, waiting for him to ask you out on a date or buy a drink. Because otherwise, you are perceived as desperate and maybe slutty. This is largely connected to the construction of gender norms. Not everyone can be Diya (Katrina Kaif) who proposes to Jai (Siddharth Malhotra) in the movie Baar Baar Dekho.

Peer pressure and expectations

Kriti Sanon in Bareilly ki Barfi was a strong woman who would not succumb to societal dominance

Image Credit: Movie – Bareilly ki Barfi

We wish we could live at peace devoid of the entire “log kya kahenge” business. But we cannot. If you suggest proposing to your boyfriend in front of your friends, some may find the idea hilarious or even outrageous. They may even end up pitying you, “You are going to propose? Aww, you poor thing!”. Your family will probably also freak out. Even in arranged marriages, women are expected to catwalk with the tray of chai and snacks, only to be criticized by the man’s family in the end. Remember why Bitti deliberately replies in negative to the man who asks her such the question of her virginity, in Bareilly ki Barfi? Not all woman has such courage in our society!

Cannot do away with labels

Women proposing are perceived as “too easy”. Even if a woman likes a guy she has to keep it in her pants because she is scared of these negative labels that are likely to be associated with them. What she does in fact, is stay within the expected and defined societal norms, to be called “womanly”!

Thanks to movies and books which epitomize a man proposing as the most important relationship goal. People have been swooning over the latest “Say yes, forever” video. Media has set very unrealistic expectations and what is weirder is the fact that we tend to succumb to these endlessly.

Sandra Bullock literally got down on her knees to propose to Ryan Reynolds in the movie

Image Credit: Movie – The Proposal

Remember when Sandra Bullock proposed to Ryan Reynolds in The Proposal? Or even when Julia Roberts confessed to Hugh Grant in Notting Hill? These women have been breaking away from stereotypes. It is essentially important to disrupt stereotypical expectations. If you like him, why shouldn’t you ask him out? Why shouldn’t you propose? Women are conquering the world in bikes and bicycles. A man’s heart is surely not a big deal!

Read Also: How Far Would You Go To Propose Your SO?

The post Why Should Men Always Propose? appeared first on HotFridayTalks.



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Why Should Men Always Propose?

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