You know the conversation, it goes something like this:

”Where do your Children go to school? What about yours?”

It might be at your local park when you meet another mom or at gymnastics class. It never fails, though, once you and another mom begin chatting, there is the inevitable comparison of what the children are, or aren’t, learning. Though it’s fading, there’s still a stigma about Homeschooled children and whether they are keeping up with their public school counterparts.

The thing is, they aren’t learning the same as their counterparts, and that’s OK. After spending so many years playing the comparison game, I realized that there are several reasons not to compare my homeschooled children to those who are traditionally schooled.

Your children aren’t socialized.

No really, they aren’t. Compared to traditionally schooled children, homeschooled children are socialized differently. They are not taught clique-like behavior from a young age, nor are they judged by the brand of their clothing. Not only are they not given to peer pressure on a daily basis, they are also not stuck in a classroom setting with 20 other children their exact age from whom they pick up bad behaviors.

Your children aren’t accurately tested.

When you study history with your child or teach them all about the Great Wall of China, you expect them to grasp the information. If you follow a curriculum to the letter, but a test shows your child failed, you wonder why they aren’t grasping the information. Then you seek ways to help them understand. You go back over the information and possibly present it in a different way. Ultimately, you want more than an A. You want total comprehension. You don’t test them, fail them, and move on.

Your children don’t have the same opportunities.

When children are in the public school setting they have the luxury of study hall, band class, field trips, and cafeteria food. Your children instead have libraries, private music lessons, home cooked meals and field trips to grandma’s or dad’s business. They might also have the one on one attention of someone in their chosen field of study mentoring them, simply because they have more flexibility in their schedules.

Your children learn at a different pace.

Sometimes that is slower, sometimes that is at warp speed. When you compare to public school students who must wait for the entire class to catch up or move forward. Homeschoolers are able to cruise through or even skip material that is below their personal comprehension level. Or perhaps your child is a struggling learner? He or she might need longer and without fear of ridicule, your child can spend 2 school years on multiplication instead of just one.

Your child isn’t as vulnerable.

When children are in the open realm of public school, they are vulnerable. They encounter more bullies, negative peer pressure, and clique-like behavior. Due to their lack of feeling vulnerable, your homeschooled child may become a strong-willed independent thinker.

There are an infinite number of reasons not to compare your homeschooler to their public school counterparts. It really wouldn’t be a fair comparison, though, because as you see, it isn’t an equal playing field.

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